Let’s do a full analysis of the IELTS Writing Task 1 response submitted by a student.

Question:

You bought an equipment from the market and when you reached home, you found that it did not work. Write a letter to the shopkeeper and in your letter, write:

1. Say why you are writing

2. What went wrong with the product you purchased

3. What you want to do now

Candidate’s Response:

Dear Sir,

I regret to inform that I purchased an LG microwave from your shop last week. Moreover, it is white in colour and weighs approximately 20 kg.

In addition to this, I was happy when I brought this electronic equipment because I got a 20% discount from your site. Unfortunately, within two days, the electronic light inside the microwave has switched off. When I insert its plug into the socket and switch it on, the processing inside the microwave starts, but the light is not visible inside while processing. So, I am not satisfied with the product.

Furthermore, I brought this issue to your shop for repair yesterday. Your workers told me that they could not repair it well. On the other hand, now it is not working at all, as the light is not visible inside it, but it was working well. So, please give me some solution to tackle this problem. I hope you will provide some suggestions for this product.

I look forward to receiving your reply.

Yours faithfully,

Ratan

Now we will analyze the above IELTS Writing Task 1 response as follows:

Paragraph 1:

Strength:

The purpose of the letter is clear, and the details of the product are mentioned.

Corrected Erroneous Statement:

I regret to inform you that the LG microwave I purchased from your shop last week has stopped working. The microwave is white in colour and weighs approximately 20 kg.

Paragraph 2:

Strength:

The problem with the product is well explained.

Corrected Erroneous Statement:

After buying this electronic equipment from your store, I was happy because I got a 20% discount from your site. Unfortunately, within two days, the electronic light inside the microwave switched off. When I plug it into the socket and switch it on, the processing inside the microwave starts, but the light is not visible. So, I am not satisfied with this product.

Paragraph 3:

Strength:

Sentence connectors (furthermore, on the other hand) are used, and the third part of the question is explained well.

Corrected Erroneous Statement:

“Your workers said that they could not repair it properly. Moreover, it is not working at all now, as the light is not visible in the indicator button.”

Expected Band Score: Band 7

The candidate has written without major errors in grammar and tense. However, there are some mistakes related to punctuation and word choice. The letter covers all the required points, and the candidate’s response is clear and understandable. Overall, it demonstrates a good command of English language and meets the criteria for a Band 7 response.