Here is a recent question that appeared in the IELTS Writing Exam. In this article, we will provide you with a model answer to the question along with important vocabulary and phrases in the passage.

The question in the Writing Section II of the IELTS Writing Exam:

“The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.”

Analyzing the question, we see that it is about the rise in the number of children who are overweight. The question clearly states that we need to mention the causes of this phenomenon, i.e., the reason behind this occurrence, and discuss the effects, i.e., how this has impacted the people involved and society in general.

Below is a model answer given by one of our trainers. We recommend you write your own answer to the question and then read the model answer. This will help you better understand where you might be going wrong.

Model Band-7 Answer:

“Over the last ten years, Western societies have seen a close to 20% rise in the number of overweight children. This essay will discuss some reasons why this has occurred and examine the consequences of this worrying trend.

The main cause of this problem is poor diet. Over the last decade, there has been a prolific increase in the number of fast food restaurants. For example, almost every high street now has McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken, and Pizza Hut. The food in these places has been proven to be very unhealthy, and much of the advertising is targeted at children, ensuring that they constitute the majority of customers. However, it is not only due to eating out but also the type of diet many children have at home. A lot of the food consumed is processed, especially ready-made meals, which are a quick and easy option for busy parents.

The effects of this have been and will continue to be very serious. Firstly, there has been a significant increase in health-related diseases among children, especially diabetes. This debilitating illness requires a child to be injected with insulin for the rest of their life. Moreover, very overweight children often experience bullying from their peers, which can negatively impact their mental health. The negative stigma of being overweight may also affect their self-esteem.

To sum up, it is evident that there are several causes of obesity among children and a variety of negative effects. Society must ensure steps are taken to prevent this problem from further deteriorating.”

Important Vocabulary and Phrases:

– Examine

– Consequences

– Prolific

– Debilitating

– Negative stigma

– Obesity

– Deteriorating

Connectors Used:

– However…

– Not only… but also…

– To sum up…

Incorrect Connectors Used:

– Firstly… (without secondly in the third paragraph)

– Not only… (without but also in the third paragraph)